Website design By BotEap.com“May the person I serve express appreciation in accordance with their own upbringing and sense of humor.” Website design By BotEap.com–Charles A. Eastman (Ohiyesa), SANTEE SIOUX Website design By BotEap.comThis intriguing quote hit my inbox the other day and brought up some interesting thoughts … we all know we’re supposed to give unconditionally and without wishing for thanks. And yet it is part of human nature to want or even need gratitude and recognition. So how do you deal with giving and your feelings when you don’t get the response you expected or wanted? Are you angry? Hurt? Grumpy? Website design By BotEap.comOf course, it is natural to react in any of these ways. But these negative emotions are tripwires that alert us to the fact that we have problems that we must solve, that we must put aside our expectations and learn to give for what it does for us, not for what it does. for the other person. Website design By BotEap.comAn even better alternative is to put yourself in their shoes, with your problems and your pride. How would you respond if you need or receive help? How would you feel about having to ask and how would that influence your answer? Often times, receiving help hurts much more than being in the situation that forces us to ask for it because our culture is based on the concepts of self-reliance and individual strength, and because accepting help is often associated with failure, laziness, or inferiority. How can you use this knowledge to improve the giving process, so that those you serve feel better about their status as recipients? Website design By BotEap.comHere’s a thought: In Buddhist parts of the world, local monks often beg for the food they eat, not because they cannot afford to buy it, but because they know that begging (receiving help) allows those who give the opportunity to improve their karma and working on the life lessons they need to master to advance the wheel of life. They plead for service to those around them (as well as their own lessons in humility and sacrifice). The next time you are helping in any way, why not thank the recipient for giving you the opportunity to learn compassion and practice humility and generosity? Let them know that your position as a receiver is as valuable as that of a giver, if not more, as it is by far the most difficult position. However, if you are giving anonymously, consider leaving an unsigned note to that effect. Website design By BotEap.comThose who receive your help are giving you a wonderful gift of the soul, but they are rarely aware of their own generosity. Be sure to fully honor their gift by presenting yours.