Website design By BotEap.comWhen the death of a loved one occurs, it often brings to the surface a cascade of emotions that need to be expressed. Too often, however, what tends to lurk in the background of grief is a combination of fear, loss of control, and worry. All three are closely related and bring an increasing amount of pain and suffering.

Website design By BotEap.comThe imagination has a habit of taking fear and magnifying it to hideous proportions. Then we start worrying about paying bills, finding or keeping a job, deciding to move, deteriorating health, or a host of other worrying issues. We are afraid of losing what little control we have left.

Website design By BotEap.comA little worry is good as it helps motivate us to start or finish a necessary task, even to avoid danger. Much can be done to manage toxic worry, to take excessive worry and turn it into something constructive. Here are seven approaches to employ.

Website design By BotEap.com1. Decrease the time spent worrying by creating a “worry time.” Find a time during the day when you can relax and spend 20 to 30 minutes going over what’s bothering you. Decide on a plan to use to treat the specific problem. Ask yourself what information you will need to make decisions about how to respond. At other times, when you’re alone and start to worry, tell yourself that you’ll take care of it at the next “worry moment” and get back to what you were doing.

Website design By BotEap.com2. Plan for the worst and then forex strategies to deal with the worst case scenario. Another approach to use during “worry time” is to look at the worst that could happen if what you’re worrying about comes true. Like if you lost your job and had to move out of your house. Think of all the possible approaches you can employ to deal with those twin changes. Who can you go to? Where will you stay? Discuss this with friends. Remember, planning is good because it takes your attention away from worrying.

Website design By BotEap.com3. Make a pact with yourself to worry only with a trusted friend. Outside of “worry time,” choose to worry only if you can talk to a trusted friend about your concern. Someone else may be able to give you a new angle to consider. There is a universal need for good listeners in times of distress. Look for them and take advantage of the great therapeutic advantage they provide.

Website design By BotEap.com4. Take immediate action. Once you have a plan, do something, anything. Start with a positive self-talk, then decide who to consult (get all the facts and information about the potential problem) and how you’ll avoid constantly dwelling on your concern. Perhaps your next step is to share your plan for feedback. We can all benefit from the observations of others.

Website design By BotEap.com5. Try to think of some of your harmful worries as a form of self-centeredness caused by negative thoughts. Some people are able to reduce the intensity of worry by realizing that continued worry is spiritual myopia and simply fuels the inner critic that constantly seeks to bring negativity to any existing problem. He keeps telling you to be careful not to catastrophize the act of worrying. Tell yourself, “It’s not as bad as I make it out to be. I’ll take care of this.” Then use a diversion or your plan.

Website design By BotEap.com6. Be motivated to limit worry by realizing that for every worrying thought you generate, you are paying a physical price at the cellular level. Since most worry never happens, hold in your thoughts the valid observation that uncontrolled worry has a damaging physical cost; drain energy. Counteract the effects by taking a daily walk or other exercise to provide a physical outlet for emotional stimuli to the muscles and heightened anxiety levels.

Website design By BotEap.com7. Prayer works to deal with worry. At some point during each day, especially at the end of “worry time,” tell yourself that you’ve done enough and turn your worry over to his Higher Power. Ask for courage and wisdom to choose the right path, to break the habit out of control. Fulton Sheen said, “All worry is atheism, because it is a lack of trust in God.” Trust that your Higher Power will give you the insights to resolve your concerns and reduce the stress they cause.

Website design By BotEap.comIn short, if you decide to worry, make a firm commitment to get all the information you need to fix it. Push toxic thoughts to the back of your mental life. Just look at the many possibilities you possess – that’s what hope is all about.

Website design By BotEap.comMake yourself aware of more possibilities by bouncing your worries around with your trusted friends. Ask this possibility that raises the question: “What would you do, in this situation?” Take what you can use to reduce worry and let go of the rest. You will tame your worries.

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