Website design By BotEap.comComing home to a warm, homey home after a day at work is one of Dad’s favorite parts of the day. After hours of phone calls from irate customers, financial statements, monotonous factory work, or even work-at-home parents, coming home to a warm dinner, a warm home, and warm hugs from loved ones is one of the reasons for which we are going to work.

Website design By BotEap.comArriving home at 9:30 one night, I expected to hear a “welcome home, honey!” from my wife, or, since we live in Japan, the Japanese greeting, “okaerinasai!” (Welcome home). Instead, what I heard from Emiko was a moan of disappointment and frustration. Was my homecoming so terrible?

Website design By BotEap.comAs is always the case, she had her reasons: the children were about to fall asleep when they heard my key in the front door lock. The eyes opened again, the “Daddy’s home!” the party started.

Website design By BotEap.comFar be it from me to turn down an invitation to fight with my 3 and 5 year olds. Being smothered in kisses from the 3 year old princess is one of the highlights of my day… however, the wrestling and kissing turned into screaming and singing, jumping and dancing. Around 11:00, it was getting late. And tomorrow was a preschool day.

Website design By BotEap.comAfter a few of these nights, we parents realized that we had to make some changes.

Website design By BotEap.comEmiko at first suggested that she come home later, say at 11:00, when the children were asleep. “Wait a minute,” I replied, “I want go home and see my children!”

Website design By BotEap.comFinally, in a moment of genius, Emiko drew up a chart and stuck it on the wall. It was filled with fun drawings of our kids doing the behaviors we all agree we should be aiming for. Get up at 7:00. Eat breakfast, change clothes, get to preschool by 9:00. In the afternoon, help mom, bathe, have dinner with good manners, brush teeth, go to bed at 9:00. You get the idea.

Website design By BotEap.comSo, for each activity, under each child’s name, they can, if they complete their task, get a sticker. That is all. Just a little colorful “dot” next to each activity. The child decides for himself whether he will reward himself with a sticker. He gets ten in one day and he’ll get a BIG sticker for that day.

Website design By BotEap.comNot high-tech, not at all. But it’s posted on the wall and, best of all, it works. When you do yours, have the children enter some of the activities and behaviors they should be looking for. Giving them a voice in how they are disciplined helps them “accept” and feel ownership and responsibility for their own behavior. Make it colorful and fun, a game with no losers. I think you will be surprised by the changes in motivation you will see.